Why Is Addiction Relapse Seen as Failure ?
By Dr.Fourkan Ali
Those who fall victim to drug or alcohol addiction will know
that it is certainly no easy ride – especially when trying to overcome it.
While trying to beat the habit once and for all, an addict will likely
experience addiction relapse, which can be distressing and uncomfortable. In many cases,
an addict will delay his or her recovery as this person is frightened that even
if he/she does overcome their addiction, they will relapse at a later date. For
many, this is a case of pride, as they do not want to be seen as a failure if
they do relapse.
However, an addiction relapse does not in any way signify
failure; it is something that can happen to anyone and the individual just
needs to pick him/herself back up again. Unfortunately, though, in some cases,
the addict will wait too long before trying again and will succumb to their
illness; this happened to Lee Nutley, whose life was documented on the TV
series Benefits
Street.
Hole
in their Lives
Lee, who appeared on the second series of Benefits Street, was found dead inside his flat by his father, just
eighteen months after the first episode of the show was aired. He passed away
due to ischemic heart disease, which was a result of long-term drug abuse; his
grief-stricken family have said it has left a hole in their lives that can
never be filled. Lee captured the hearts of the show’s fans with his honesty
and humour; he was open about his drug issues and talked about his close
relationship with his mother, Chrissie.
‘A
Lovable Rogue’
Speaking
of the tragedy, Chrissie said, “He didn’t hide anything about himself.
Sometimes he didn’t make the right decisions in his life. He was a brilliant
lad – a lovable rogue.”
Lee has
left behind three sisters, 42-year-old Lynsey, 40-year-old Dawn and 30-year-old
Kirsty. Dawn explained that he had worked the majority of his life fixing
steel, like his father before him.
Chrissie
added, “He worked all over the country. Wherever the jobs were. They used to
call him ‘Dangerous Brian’ because he was always tripping over or getting into
an accident or something. The drugs ruined all that. He was 25 before he ever
touched them.”
Bad
Experiences
Chrissie
went on to explain that her son faced much heartbreak in his life, which
‘knocked him’ and piled pressure onto him; this did not help as he was
suffering from addiction already. She said, “He hid a lot. He had a lot of bad
experiences through his life. He found his nana dead – he had always been close
to her – I think that knocked him. Years later, he woke up and found his
girlfriend, Katrina, had died during the night while she was lying next to him.
He did a lot of bad things while he was on the drugs, but I never turned my
back on him – he could talk to me about anything. And when he told me he was
sorry for everything he had done, I said, ‘I know son. It wasn’t you; it was
the addiction’.”
‘I
Can’t Believe He’s Gone’
Speaking
fondly of her brother, Lynsey said, “He was a good brother. We always looked
after him. He was always laughing. He loved old people and kids, and he loved
his dog Mitsy.”
While
Kirsty said, “He loved his grandkids, Indi-Rae and Arya. All the bairns miss
him. He used to joke around a lot, but it was never nasty. He used to look
after people. After he died, a girl came up to us and said he had stood up for
her when they were kids and she was being bullied at school.”
His mother added, “After Benefits Street,
the council said they were going to sort him out – they didn’t. I’m going to
try and do something in his name. They need to do follow-up programs to help
people like Lee. I can’t believe he’s gone – my beautiful son. I miss him so
much.”
The writer Teacher & Columnist
8801611579267
dr.fourkanali@gmail.com
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